When I'm creating and making art I can be myself, fully and completely without any inhibitions. I don't have to play any roles, as we all do in our daily lives. When I'm creating I'm not a daughter, a friend, a cousin, a girlfriend, a lover, an employee, a neighbor, a citizen, a women or even an artist. I play the role of an artist only when I my work is finished and I share it with others. When I create I'm essentially me, no roles attached. When I create I allow myself to express whatever I want to or need to, I can be as messy and forceful as I want to be or as precise and deliberate, it all depends. I can be as irrational or obsessive or angry or crazy as I wish or I can choose to be kind and tender and gentle. Anything goes. But, honestly most of the time I fell like expressing my more forceful, intense, energetic side: a powerful burst of uninhibited energy. Majority of the time, in my daily life, I am kind, compassionate and understanding, polite and generally "nice" so making art provides great outlet for me to unleash my more aggressive and energetic side.
Usually only other time when I am able to fully express that side of me is when training. Not many people know this, but I'm bit of a fitness nut and I love exercising. I work out almost every day (occasionally I take rest days) but if I don't have a chance to exercise few days in a row I get very restless and nervous. I usually crave intense physical activity but earlier this year due to a minor injury I got into yoga. It took me some time to learn to like it but now I do. When I'm doing yoga at home, before I start my practice I say to myself "move as you wish", giving myself permission to move freely and to give my body what it needs. And I kinda do the same before I start working on a new art piece. Before I begin a new drawing I usually tell myself something like "do as you wish", "take what you need", "express whatever needs to be expressed". That way I'm giving myself a permission to create anyway I want to and to be myself, no expectations to fulfill, no roles to play, nothing to prove, nothing to gain. I let my intuition guide me and I allow myself to be fully present and immersed into creative process. I let my creative energy flow freely and I'm willing to accept anything that comes out of that process. I'm not always satisfied with the results, I don't always like my finished drawings, (or to be more accurate me as an artist who does have expectations on what "good art" should look like can be unsatisfied with the results) but it's ok, I'm willing to accept that it's all just part of the process, I don't beat myself over it and simply move on. I think that's why I'm able to be pretty prolific and not experience any artist's blocks.
But it did took me some time to come to a place of allowing myself to just be me and create freely. And, of course when I'm working on a commission and have specific guidelines my approach is slightly different and not as free or uninhibited as my personal work but even working with some restrictions is ok knowing that in my personal work I can express myselfas I wish and through that creative process give myself whatever I need to stay energized, healthy and happy, both emotionally and mentally.